Today my dad sent me a link to a blog post by Dan of Single Dad Laughing. If you have time, I really recommend it. It's kinda lenghthy, but it is completely worth it. The end is so powerful. You can read it here:
So, because I don't mind sharing my imperfections, I figured I should take a huge leap for me and admit some of my flaws.
1. I was suicidal for quite a while about 3 years ago. I had a note written and it all planned out. I would have taken my own life, had my mom not found the note before I wanted her too.
2. I blamed myself for most of the bad things that have happened in my life, and the lives of my family. I'm just now learning to overcome that self-blame.
3. I hate it when people compliment me, because I feel like they secretly just feel sorry for me, and they don't really mean it.
4. I have horrible self-esteem. It's getting better, but it isn't good...
5. I love to sing, but I don't know if I'm a good singer, so I rarely use my "real voice" when I sing around other people.
6. One of my biggest fears/obstacles is that I'm paranoid that I'm annoying or that people just don't like me and won't tell me to my face.
7. I hide at social events/church/parties/family events/etc because I'm afraid of people. I would rather work at said events than have to face my fear and actually hang out with people.
8. I sometimes fear that I will never amount to anything because of my own inhibitions.
9. I never feel good enough, so I overcompensate in any way I can.
10. I honestly feel like if I just disappeared, no one would notice, much less care, so I alternate between hiding away and being wild and crazy so people will notice me.
I think ten is enough for now. If anyone reads this and wants to post theirs in the comments, feel free to do so. I love you all. Good night and God bless.